§235 Mr. Duck Is Bitten By The Green MonsterOctober 5, 2008
Here’s a sketch I wrote for Shabat school in July. Just thought I’d make it public. Mr. Duck is trying to teach on the subject of envy, but is himself bitten by the Green Monster. Will Dr. Porcupine find a contentment remedy powerful enough to cure the bites?
Ages: From 6 yrs old, to 12 yrs old
Props: Hammer with “contentment” written on it, ambulance
Puppets: 4 (Duck, Cow, Green Monster, Dr. Porcupine)
Duck – Hello, kids! Today we’re gonna talk about… ouch! This chair is really uncomfortable!
Cow – Duck you’re sitting right on my horns!
Duck – Oh, sorry about that. Anyway, today we’re talking about envy. We’re supposed to be happy with what we have and not envy others. There’s a figure of speak that when you get envious, you get bitten by the green monster.
Cow – That sounds scary! I dont wanna get bitten by a green monster!
Duck – Well, there is none. It’s just a figure of speak *Green monster peaking out from behind the curtain when they both look the other way*
Duck – Anyway. I, for instance, went to a great holiday with my parents to the local pond where we swam around and quacked. And I am content with that, and not jealous of…
Cow – Really? You’re so lucky. I’ve never swum in a pond. All I did was going with my parents to Paris and climb the Eiffel tower. It’s pretty high. I got a little dizzy.
Duck – You… you went to Paris?? *being bitten in the toe by the green monster without noticing*
Cow – Yes. You’re lucky to stay here where it’s all safe and secure and just quack around in your pond. Besides, you need to go by air plane. It’s really scary being up in the air and everything. But it is pretty cool to see the clouds from above.
Duck – I’ve… never gone by air plane in my entire life… *bitten in the side by the green monster*
Cow – And besides, the Eiffel tower was just a small part of the trip. We went to Germany and England also. I met cows with all kinds of different colors and languages. I even learned how to mooh in German and French. And we ate a gazillion different types of grass. I was just exhausted when I came home. You’re lucky you stayed right here and swam around in your pond.
Duck – I got fed bread chunks from the local kids… I think some of them are in the audience. *Green monster taking great chunks of him*
Cow – Uhm… duck… don’t look now… but I think there’s a green monster on you!
Duck – Where? Where? *looking all around, monster is moving to be behind his head all the time, keeps biting him*
Cow – Duck! Are you feeling ok? Is the contentment ok?
Duck – Contentment?
Cow – Yes, the contentment you read about in 1 Timothy 6:6 *quoting the verse*
Duck – Huh?
Cow – Oh, come on! Have we switched parts? Am I the one to teach you now??
Duck – I wanna go to Paris
Cow – Hello?? Duck?? Are you there?
Duck – It’s no fair! I wanna be the one to go to Paris! Why did you get to go!
Cow – This bite seems severe. I’m calling 911.
*Ambulance comes and picks the duck up to the hospital. Cow follows*
*Duck lies unconscious on the bed*
Cow – Doctor porcupine – will he be ok?
Porcupine – He’ll be fine. He got severly bitten by the green monster, but all you need is a little mix of 1 Timothy 6:6, Hebrews 13:5 and the tenth commandment, plus a bunch of love, 1 Corinthian 13:4 style *quote all verses*. Here, I’m mixing them all in this shot and we’ll just inject this right in this fellow’s buttocks.
Cow – Why there? Can’t you do it in the arm or something?
Porcupine – Sure, but that would be less funny. Now move your dangerous sharp horns from my face while I inject this
Cow (to herself) – Oh, he’s one to talk about having sharp things on the body
Duck – Ouch! *Duck jumps up* What was that?
Cow – You were bitten by the green monster! But this porcupine doctor fixed you. Now we can continue to teach kids about envy and contentment and stuff
Porcupine – Didn’t we just do that though?
Cow – Not quite. We still have a few more points we want to get through. Right duck?
Duck (holding his buttocks) – Yes, yes we do. For instance, try to lay on your back in the hospital if you have silly porcupine doctors.
Porcupine – Right. And don’t let the green monster bite you. When he comes just chase him away with contentment *swinging a hammer with the words contentment on*
Green monster – Hey! You’re not being very nice! All I want is lunch!
Duck – But we are not going to let you bite us, because we will love people, and be HAPPY for them when they get good stuff instead of envy them! So take a hike *grabs the porcupine who is still holding the hammer and beats the green monster with him*
Porcupine – Aaaah! I did not sign up for this! Let me go!
Duck – No, you’re perfect! Full of sharpy things and eveything!
Cow – Alright, I guess I will teach the kids then. Kids! What did this teach you so far?
*Base the rest of the lesson on the answers from the kids. Emphasize points they may have missed, tell the story of John and James wanting the good places next to Jesus and the envy of the other disciples. Involve the other animals with the rest of the lesson as needed. Improvise*