§302 I love my wifeMarch 1, 2009
I’m sitting in front of the computer with a large white empty Word-document laughing at me. Maybe starting writing about that will help me get up the speed and start writing. The idea is that now is the time to actually write that blog post that I have meant to write so many times but never knew how to start. I intend to try to somehow write about my love to my wife. In some sort of way try to grasp it in a few short digital rows. Somehow describe the indescribable. Try to hunt those feelings down, kill them by giving them a definition and staple them as words on the screen as some sort of bizarre trophy of victory over my soul. The victory of being able to describe it.
I have already achieved two green-underlined sentences for not being grammatically correct. Because in order to describe the indescribable it would be impossible to follow all the rules set by the book. I must break a few boundaries, if not all. This cannot, nor will it be a normal blog post. So let’s begin:
Half-blank screen still staring at me.
But where do I start? Should I write historically, describing the feelings when I first met her, and about how the love grew with time? Should I write about the first difficult years of marriage getting adjusted to one another and the way I came to love her more and more for every day. How each day I was thinking that it’s impossible to love more than I do now, but yet it kept growing day by day and still does. Should I get technical and write about the difference between being in love and real love, and how we found the difference and the perfect balance? Should I rather write about the mutual feelings today, how the “me” and “her” have grown together to a perfect “we” that can’t ever be separated? Should I explain that we don’t care if it’s unfashionable to be co-dependant on one another, and that we don’t care about the individualistic focus today’s society makes, and that we can proudly say that we love one another and no one can imagine his/her life without the other? Should I present you with the keys to this success: open hearted communication, mutual trust, full non-refundable commitment and constant striving to make the other feel loved?
Or maybe I should just leave all that aside. Why trying to describe love as some sort of lump growing out of your chest, and why write about details of our relationship and brag about the successes we’ve accomplished, when it should really all be about how much I love HER and not technical details about the keys to those successes.
First of all I love her because she is an inseparable part of me. I cannot imagine my life without her, and I cannot understand how I ever did live without her before we met.
Sometimes when I tell her I love her she responds by “why”, just to see what I’ll say, and I don’t have any real answer.
How could I answer that with just a few words, with just a sentence? I wind up mentioning one of the million things I love her for. Like her nose. I love that beautiful nose of hers.
Another day I might answer that I love her because she is my wife. And she is my wife because I love her. And I love her because she is my wife.
I love her because her eyes are beautiful.
I love her because she can build web pages with notepad.
I love her because she is the best mother ever that any kids could get.
I love her because she keeps the home in a great shape – no, not just cleaning and cooking. But also painting and drilling and plumbing and electricity wiring.
I love her because she laughs at the same jokes as I do.
I love her because she is so funny and knows exactly what makes me laugh.
I love her because she has the same opinions as I about mostly everything, including politics and religion.
I love her because she is just as crazy as I about learning languages.
I love her because she can play the piano.
I love her because she finds the funny things to joke about in the most difficult situations.
I love her because she always makes me motivated when I feel down.
I love her because her mere existence makes me feel good.
I love her because she always tell me the truth even if it’s uncomfortable
I love her because she has written stories about pink gnus from Peru
I love her because she is so beautiful and sexy, (but she still thinks that I’m lying when I tell her that).
I love her because she is great at counting potatoes
I love her because she can say things like “Everything that isn’t planned doesn’t necessarily un-happen”
I love her ears, her eyes, her chin, her hair…. actually every single centimeter of her (yes, including the armpit), because it’s her.
I love her, I love her, I love her, I love her.